Books, Books everywhere and not a page to read...

Since I quit one job, and the new one does not start until August 2nd, I have found myself with a lot of time on my hands. I have been reading. I went through a lot of books I have already read and picked out some to reread, and I also read some books that I had read portions of for certain classes such as How the Dead Live by Will Self, and reread those. I have rated the following books on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being "this book was so bad it gave me fits of violent, projectile vomiting" and 10 being "This book changed my life. I feel I can do anything now that I have read this book." Let's just say 1 is very bad, and 10 is really, really good. A 5 is fair to midland. Nothing great but nothing terrible either. Onto the list.

Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov - 9. Those who know me, know that I love this book. The lyrical style alone is enough to place Nabokov on a pedestal. If you have not read this book forget that it is about a love between a child molesting male and a 12 year old girl, and read this book. Humbert Humbert is perhaps the greatest creation in all of literature. One has to be a real master to solicit the type of sympathy that Nabokov creates for poor Humbert. Look for places where the facade cracks in Humbert's story, and the truth seeps in. They will break your heart if you let them.

Sanctuary - William Faulkner - 7. I have to admit I am torn on this book. It is either really great, and I am missing something, or I am not missing a thing and this book is terrible. I have reread it twice since I first read it in June. Something about this text just creeps me out I guess. I am fascinated by it. I keep thinking that it can not be this simple and straight forward and that I am missing some nuance that will open the text up to me, and the light bulb will appear above my head and all will be made clear. It is a great read, however, and Faulkner is a master. I still contend that Cormac McCarthy does Faulkner better than Faulkner. Read Blood Meridian and see if you agree.

Three Farmers on the Way to a Dance - Richard Powers - 8. See the aforementioned cock stroking I gave Powers in a previous post.

White Noise - Don Delillo - 5. I promised myself I would reread this book since I read Mao II. I originally read it in my first graduate course and hated it. I thought maybe I was just naive then and that my years of training would enlighten me to the nuances of this book. I was wrong. It still sucks. I like Mao II but I still do not dig this book. I can see that Delillo does some interesting things with this book: critiques pop culture and reliance on mass media, warns against the danger of crowds, and their reliance on collectivism vs objectivism but this book is still dull. I just did not enjoy reading it.

The Crying of Lot 49 - Thomas Pynchon - 8. Another critic I know and respect critiqued this book on his blog, and he did not like it. I disagree. While I will not champion this book or try to defend it's personal appeal to me over it's lack of appeal to other critics I will say that I simply thought it was a cool book. I LOVE the Courier's Tragedy section, but then again I love Renaissance tragedy and comedy plays like The Duchess of Malfi, Volpone, The Way of the World, and of course, Shakespeare. I like having to filter through the bullshit and the digressions in order to find the moral of the story or to discover that there is no moral just a story that does not really go anywhere.

Grendel - John Gardner - 5. This book is a retelling of Beowulf written from Grendel's point of view. It was ok. I mean I like the Beowulf story, and it was cute. Grendel laments his decision to grab Beowulf, and blames his defeat on carelessness, and blood on the floor. He thinks he could take Beowulf straight up if they were to have another dust up. However, this book was a little heavy on the nihilism, and cruel cruel world outlook. Grendel basic outlook is that the world is arbitrary and cold, and the nothing matters. We all prattle along in our little lives fufilling our desires and wishes until we die, and that this is shallow and has no meaning. Whatever. He just needs someone to talk to, and seeks to prove the arbitrary and cruelness of the world to the danes through their slaughter. As I said heavy handed and moralistic.

How the Dead Live - Will Self - 4. I am torn about this book, also. I don't really like it, per se, but I don't really dislike it. Self has an imaginative book but one that I ultimately did not care about. Great premise: when we die we just have to move to other parts of the city, and eventually to the suburbs to clear room for new people,and we are faced with unresolved conflicts from our lives, and we must sort these conflicts out in order to pass on to nirvana, or we will be reborn into our suffering. Lilly Bloom is also a funny character and this book really has some genuine laugh out loud scenes but ultimately it was nothing I would read again or recommend it. It was one of those books that you read and say that was ok, but I don't really want to read it again. It pains me somewhat to know that I will have to read more self in the fall for my independent study. I think Self is very talented and creative but his stuff is just not my style. Too overly British I guess. Who the fuck knows why we like some stuff but not others? It is merely subjective, and my subjectiveness tells me that Self is not my cup o' tea.

White Teeth - Zadie Smith - 8. This is a great book. Funny, insightful, and meaningful. Zadie Smith's White Teeth is a book that spans 25 years of two families in North London. The Joneses and the Iqbals are an unlikely a pairing of families, but their intertwined destinies illustrate the assimilation of minorities into the British Empire in the 20th century. It also tells the tell of loss of culture and the ways that this assimilation into dominant cultures affects immigrants. Smith proves to be a master at dialogue, and characterization. It is a novel that if funny, and poignant at times. I highly recommend this book.

Last but certainly not least: The Sun Also Rises - Ernest Hemingway - "I give it a 10, a fucking 10. I still got wood." Anyone know where that quote comes from? I cannot honestly say this book 'gave me wood' but it is still by far my favorite book. I reread it every summer to remind me why it is I chose to major in English. I still get pissed at Cohn for knocking Jake out, and I agree with Little E that Hemingway makes the life of living abroad and drinking with friends every night seem very appealing from a distance. However, all my love of literature comes back to threeworks: This book, Old Yeller, and Where the Red Ferns Grow. If it were not for these book I would probably be a third year law student at the moment preparing for the Bar Exam or some shit with a great job lined up, and secure future/long term outlook. Fucking books.

I am currently reading and have read other books and I will add them to the blog from time to time. I have been dividing my time lately fair equally between playing NCAA Football 2004, reading, and watching Israel in concern and contempt bomb Lebanon into oblivion. They have now begun the ground invasion, and it is only a matter of time before Syria and Iran get involved and the world as we know it comes to an abrupt end. I wonder if the world will truly end "not with a bang but with a whimper?"

Warning the following is a random digression:

I have been reading a lot about Nuclear Detonations recently because I read online that Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld thinks the reason that Al Qaida has been so quiet recently is that they are planning a large scale nuclear attack on American soil, and that this attack would not be carried out in New York or LA but more likely in Chicago, or Dallas/Houston.

With this in mind I thought"I wonder what it would be like to be vaporized?" What I actually wonder is "if you are caught in a Nuclear Blast do you simply cease to exist?" Do you recognize how fucked up your situation has become so quickly, or if you don't really even notice that some rank fuckery of the highest note has taken place. Do you hear the explosion, get blinded by the blast, and wait patiently to either be incinerated or better yet wait to be left burnt, blinded, and dying? Here is what I found out. Most of this comes from Wikipedia so I am not 100% certain that it is "kosher," but I think it's credibility is valid.

The energy released from a nuclear weapon comes in four primary categories:
Blast = 40-60% of total energy
Thermal radiation = 30-50% of total energy
Ionizing radiation = 5% of total energy
Residual radiation (fallout) = 5-10% of total energy

For most atomic weapons I found that there tends to be three levels of blast radius.

The first is between 100 feet and 1000 feet. I have labeled this the "The Don't Be Near a Nuclear Explosion Range" or "The I just shit my pants but luckily I will be totally vaporized so I don't have worry about embarrassing moments range." Don't be this close. It has roughly a zero survival rate. You will hear a loud boom, be blinded by the flash bang of the detonation, and incinerated within seconds. Luckily, one website stated it happens very quickly, and is relatively painless. I guess that would have to be as painless as getting incinerated can be. If you happen to be standing near any buildings not destroyed by the blast you body will leave a dark shadow on the wall from where the thermal radiation contacting your body. It will make a simple radiation imprint, and alas that will be all that remains of you. At Hiroshima they took pictures of people who had the patterns on their Kimonos burnt into their skin from the radiation.

The second range is from 2000 to 10000 feet. I call this the "better than the the "shit my pants evaporation range but you are still pretty much fucked range." One website actually said "the farther away from the bomb the higher the chance of survival so attempt to be as far away as possible." In this range you will feel intense heat, a very bright light or flash, but no noise. Actually the blast is moving much faster than the speed of sound, and the noise simply has not arrived yet. This, however, is supposed to alert you that you are not in the core blast area, and that your chances for survival are much higher. Do not be tempted to turn and look directly at the flash. This will burn your retinas and blind you. Duck and cover. Do this to attempt to shield yourself from the intense thermal radiation. The better the cover the better the chance of survival. The blast can actually last longer than 2 minutes depending on the strength so stay down and wait for the shockwave to pass. You will fill a pulse in the air that goes out - in- out. This should alert you to the end of the shockewave. Also be wary of flying debris. It would suck to not be burnt alive only to be impelled by a flying dog.

The last range I call the "Welcome to Tromaville Range" based on the Toxic Avenger's home town. It is 10,000 feet to up to several hundred miles. Congratulations, you missed the bomb but get the fallout. Prepare for mutants, cancer, and radiation poisoning. Fortunately the fallout can take several hours to settle from the atomosphere, and give you plenty of time to find suitable shelter such as a bomb shelter with several years worth of supplies. Yeah, good luck with that. Remember if you absorb more than 400 units of radiation then your chances of survival are 50/50.

Lets just hope that we can get this whole situation in the Middle East under control pretty fast. I am not interested in becoming a mutant, or living my life in a bad 80's nuclear panic book.