Houston, We have a Problem...

Although I recently finished reading Thane Rosenbaum's Golems of Gotham (which I began like two months ago) I have encountered a problem: I have reading block. That is right folks, reading block. I don't want to read anything. I am even having trouble reading the entirity of blogs. Except for A Disturbed Universe. I concur with many of J's assessments of the problems with family get togethers. Why are holidays/family get togethers such an asswhip/burden at times? Speaking of which is anyone looking for a roommate? My mother is driving me crazy. I promise I will even help you move her shit in. Just Kidding...well, sort of.

Anyway, I don't want to read anything. Well let me rephrase that: I want to read a ton of shit: Nabokov, Faulkner, McCarthy, and Swift, but I simply cannot force myself to focus, and finish what I start. I hate this. I used to read a ton now I cannot read anything. I have even been skimming when I read emails. It is terrible. I am not sure how I can fix this. I seem to have acquired a phobia of reading. I have resorted to playing Madden NFL 2006 instead of reading late into the evenings. One upside is that I have totally rewritten the NFL record books for offensive and defensive production. One drawback is that I am in danger of becoming a total zombie.

I also have been watching a lot of movies. X Men 3 was pretty good. It was a comic book movie so don't expect any Oscar Award winning theatrics. Good Night, and Good Luck was also fabulous. Dreamer was ok. Kind of like Racing Stripes for Adults. Hustle and Flow was Excellent. Great Soundtrack and Terrance Howard was excellent as D Jay.

The whole Job Search Thing has triggered a new level of stress and depression that has spun my sleeping habits out of control. I am basically sleeping like 3 hours a night, and 3 hours a day at odd times like 5 in the afternoon. I have realized one thing: I am basically unqualified to do anything except become a professor. I have "educated" myself out of most entry level positions, and there is nothing currently available in publishing which seems to be the only other thing you can FUCKING DO WITH A MASTERS IN ENGLISH. I have a degree I can't do shit with except become a professor. Don't even come at with that high school bullshit. I am decidely NOT interested in that educational opportunity. I will seriously KARATE KICK THE SHIT OUT OF THE NEXT PERSON WHO SUGGEST I APPLY FOR TEACHING GIGS AT HIGH SCHOOLS. First, I have thought of that. I won't get paid until October so it is out. Plus high school sucks my fucking arse. Even coaching football could not assauge the fucking hemorraghic wound teaching high school would inflict. What the FUCK was I thinking when I let Dr. D convince me this was a much better career choice than going to Law school at Texas Tech?

I am seriously second guessing my decision to turn down Law School in favor of pursuing a career in Academia. I could be gearing up to take the state bar exam right now and looking for a position at a major firm in International Business or Criminal Defense. Add this to the salt that was rubbed in my wound by being accepted to Florida State without an assistantship, and not being able to graduate to attend Tulane before the Hurricane and I am thinking God is trying to tell me to get the fuck out and go to Law school.

Well, I have to go. I have an interview as a Leasing Agent at an apartment complex this afternoon. It will probably end up being in South Oak Cliff or some shit knowing my fucking luck. I swear, I may go on a shooting/Karate Kicking spree if it is. Reminds me of that episode of Beavis and Butthead where Beavis dreams he is Kane from Kung Fu. "Does not the tree need the sun? Does not the mountain need the storm? Does not your nuts need kicking?" Classic.